Home Sweet Home

We all know that if you want to have a happy family you have to make compromises, you have to make some sacrifices, you have to be creative, spontaneous, loving, understanding. You have to be a lot of this, right?

Many families starts with two members: a wife and a husband. They offer each other all the attention, all the love, they make compromises just for them. Another important thing is that they are still lovers. Most of this thins change when in this family appears a child. The newborn steals most of the things mentioned earlier and in that moment it’s inevitable for one of the lovers to feel neglected.

When someone feels neglected they start not to be so involved. How many times haven’t you seen or heard: “ You don’t have time for me” “You don’t listen to me anymore” . These thins appear because the wife and the husband forget about the jacket named “lover” and dress the one named “parent”. Their availability turns away from each other.

For every family to function properly is important that the parents are first of all a couple and not parents. You may wonder why? Well the answer is very simple… if the wife is happy, satisfied and the husband feels recognized for what he is, for the things he brings for his family then it means they offer each other everything they need. As long as they put on first place the couple and their love they will always have time to raise and nurture their children.

If the couple of lovers feels secure, safe, good it’s guaranteed that they will be able to invest in a different way in their home and the child will learn better things, including giving and expressing his feelings.

If you experience after the birth of your child one of the next things:
1. – you feel that your partner doesn’t understands you anymore;
2. – you fight a lot;
3. – you feel things got colder between you and your loved one;
4. – your intimate life is less present that before.
You should know that you lost contact with you loved one and you have to rebuilt the relationship.
Good luck!

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About Iris Lulea

Psychologist specialized in Family, Couple and Children Therapy at S.P.E.R.